Why Being Behind is Not the Same as Being Off Course

I realized halfway through lunch today that I'd let the weekend pass without writing this week's Change Anchor. I typically carve out time in the early weekend mornings to focus on writing content, but with the 4th of July holiday and relentless family obligations, Monday came and went too.

As I write this, I know I'm not alone in this moment of feeling behind. Meetings and family obligations go back to back, and then on top of everything there's the pressure to keep up with AI, learning and upskilling in your "free time." Here's the part that got me today though. I spend my days helping people figure out how to find their anchor when everything is changing around them, and for a quick minute, falling behind on a LinkedIn post and my newsletter felt like evidence of something bigger than a busy week.

It wasn't. It was just a busy week. But I noticed how fast my brain wanted to turn "I'm behind" into "I'm failing," and I would guess I'm not the only one running that "voice" without realizing she's doing it.

I know that being behind and being off course are two completely different things, and most of us conflate them the second there's any gap between what we planned and what actually happened. I see this constantly with the people I work with, and even in my kids. A missed deadline, a skipped workout, a certification that's been sitting half finished since 2019, and instead of registering it as "the week got full," the brain jumps straight to a verdict about your identity. The storyline changes to you're not disciplined enough, you're not committed enough, or everyone else has it together and you don't.

Except I would bet that most of the people who look like they "have it together" are one bad week away from the exact same feeling. Being behind is just "data" about your human capacity for getting things done in that particular week. It's not a referendum on who you are or where you're headed. The moment you can separate those two things, you get your footing back a lot faster than if you spend the week arguing with yourself about what it means.

ONE THING THIS WEEK

Reflection question: What's one thing on your own to-do list right now that you've quietly turned into an internal verdict about yourself instead of just a task that didn't get done yet? I'd ask you to just sit with the difference this week. Don't fix it, just notice what story you're telling yourself about that thing, and why you haven't done it.

ONE THING I'M LOVING 🩵

I did manage to slip in a well-needed mid-day break where I grabbed my book and sat outside in the warm sun for a full hour and just relaxed. Even my Oura ring gave me the thumbs up, notifying me that "your body is nice and relaxed, savor it as a sign of balance with the stress peaks of daily life." I don't know that I've ever taken instructions from a piece of jewelry so willingly.

This is the kind of week after such a busy extended weekend where I'd love to curl up with a book and do nothing else. However, I do have commitments that don't allow me to do that, and I think that's more useful to admit than to hide. If something on your own list has been quietly turning into a verdict this week, I'd love to hear what it is. Drop me a note by just hitting reply. 

Warmly,

Heather

Anchored in Possibility™ | The future belongs to those who know who they are when everything changes.